I was browsing through emails from the time I spent in Zambia in '07-'08 and found this letter that I wrote to some friends about 7 months into my stay. Thought I would share...
"Yesterday, I was reminded of the reasons I am here and decided it was time for me to write about the things i have to be grateful for. Many of you know that it has been a difficult time for me here, but be assured it has been amazing as well. When i was 21 I moved to Memphis to study Physical Therapy and my youth pastor was giving me a little pep talk before I left. I have never forgotten what he said: 'It will be hard, but hard is what makes it good'. That has been so true of many seasons in my life. Last year in a time of worship at homegroup, a friend had a picture for me. He said he saw two trees, one was planted next to a stream in fields of green and the other was planted on a mountainside in the midst of rocks and cliffs. God spoke to me through that picture: 'I have chosen to plant you in a high place and it's not a comfortable environment.'
One thing that amazes me here is how dry and dead everything is at times and then suddenly you see flowers start to bloom. Talk about an extreme environment, but there are plants that thrive in it, were made for it. I have experienced more anxiety and physical fear here than i have in most of my adult life, but I feel it transforming me. God speaks to me a lot through my running and one thing I have found is that every time I push myself to go a little longer or farther or on a more difficult path, the next time I run, I am stronger and faster for having pushed myself. I know that is true of my experience here. When I first got here God spoke this word to me out of the blue one day... fortitude... definition - ability to endure; quality of character combining courage and staying-power. My response at the time, i hope i have it.
I wrote this in a journal in July of 2006: 'Revelation on my run this morning... how many of us miss out on the fullness of life because we don't want to pay the price? Experiencing the fullness of what God has for us requires sacrifice. I got to the point in the run where I could turn and go down a hill to run along Lake Michigan or stay on the 'high ground'. I knew that if I went down, that meant having to run back up, but the benefit to paying that price is that the Lake inspires me to run faster and stronger. So I took the turn and on the way back up the hill, which was tough, I said a simple prayer. 'Lord I want to be one who will take the hills'.
God has answered so many prayers in my short time here and has done miracles. Many of you prayed for rain back in October when the ground was dry. Well we ended up having more rain than they have seen in 100 years, which actually began to be harmful to the people, crops, and livestock. About a month ago, i started asking God to stop the rain and bring the sun back. I prayed lengthy, specific prayers and still it poured, even flooded for days and weeks at a time. Then last week I was praying and the Holy Spirit led me to ask Him for mercy, so I did. I asked Him to have mercy on the people and the land. Next thing i knew the sun was out and the rain had gone. We have had sunny days since, with just minor showers.
He has led me as He has my whole life, beside streams of living water and restored my soul. My times with Him have been sweet and beyond what words can express. He has done everything He said He would do and has never failed me. Everything i have needed, He has provided and some things I didn't know I needed. I know that He ordains the times and places where we live and His ways are perfect. I have no idea what's ahead, but I believe that the steps will be easier having been here with only Him to lean on."
"Yesterday, I was reminded of the reasons I am here and decided it was time for me to write about the things i have to be grateful for. Many of you know that it has been a difficult time for me here, but be assured it has been amazing as well. When i was 21 I moved to Memphis to study Physical Therapy and my youth pastor was giving me a little pep talk before I left. I have never forgotten what he said: 'It will be hard, but hard is what makes it good'. That has been so true of many seasons in my life. Last year in a time of worship at homegroup, a friend had a picture for me. He said he saw two trees, one was planted next to a stream in fields of green and the other was planted on a mountainside in the midst of rocks and cliffs. God spoke to me through that picture: 'I have chosen to plant you in a high place and it's not a comfortable environment.'
One thing that amazes me here is how dry and dead everything is at times and then suddenly you see flowers start to bloom. Talk about an extreme environment, but there are plants that thrive in it, were made for it. I have experienced more anxiety and physical fear here than i have in most of my adult life, but I feel it transforming me. God speaks to me a lot through my running and one thing I have found is that every time I push myself to go a little longer or farther or on a more difficult path, the next time I run, I am stronger and faster for having pushed myself. I know that is true of my experience here. When I first got here God spoke this word to me out of the blue one day... fortitude... definition - ability to endure; quality of character combining courage and staying-power. My response at the time, i hope i have it.
I wrote this in a journal in July of 2006: 'Revelation on my run this morning... how many of us miss out on the fullness of life because we don't want to pay the price? Experiencing the fullness of what God has for us requires sacrifice. I got to the point in the run where I could turn and go down a hill to run along Lake Michigan or stay on the 'high ground'. I knew that if I went down, that meant having to run back up, but the benefit to paying that price is that the Lake inspires me to run faster and stronger. So I took the turn and on the way back up the hill, which was tough, I said a simple prayer. 'Lord I want to be one who will take the hills'.
God has answered so many prayers in my short time here and has done miracles. Many of you prayed for rain back in October when the ground was dry. Well we ended up having more rain than they have seen in 100 years, which actually began to be harmful to the people, crops, and livestock. About a month ago, i started asking God to stop the rain and bring the sun back. I prayed lengthy, specific prayers and still it poured, even flooded for days and weeks at a time. Then last week I was praying and the Holy Spirit led me to ask Him for mercy, so I did. I asked Him to have mercy on the people and the land. Next thing i knew the sun was out and the rain had gone. We have had sunny days since, with just minor showers.
He has led me as He has my whole life, beside streams of living water and restored my soul. My times with Him have been sweet and beyond what words can express. He has done everything He said He would do and has never failed me. Everything i have needed, He has provided and some things I didn't know I needed. I know that He ordains the times and places where we live and His ways are perfect. I have no idea what's ahead, but I believe that the steps will be easier having been here with only Him to lean on."
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